Showing posts with label Silly. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Silly. Show all posts

Friday, March 19, 2021

James White Obsession Syndrome

Now that the COVID scare is dissipating, I'm interrupting my normal programming to make my readers aware of a syndrome that appears to infect a small percentage of people... primarily American Roman Catholic males with access to the Internet. Fortunately, the great majority of American Roman Catholic males with access to the Internet appear to be immune (in fact, they have no idea who James White is or what the Roman church actually teaches). 

For a small group though, an interest in apologetics may run the risk of developing into a full-blown James White Obsession Syndrome. What begins as simply learning to defend their church and their beliefs, if unchecked, turns into an obsession with James White. There are signs that you may be infected:

1) A lengthy amount of time is spent negatively mentioning James White on blogs, Facebook, Twitter, YouTube videos, and any form of social media that allows the inner-narcist to take control of a keyboard.  

2) If James White is mentioned, you feel the uncontrolable urge to add a comment about how awful you think James White is. 

This syndrome is hard to cure. There is though a remedy that may work on those who are not too deeply infected:

1) Direct the sufferer to the official Vatican website.

2) Locate the Vatican search engine. Type in the words, "James White." Typically, the results will say this: "0 results have been found for "James White"


3) Using the technique of cognizant dissonance, slowly explain to the sufferer that the Vatican has no idea who James White is, nor do they care who James White is. 

4) Explain to the sufferer that if they really want to be faithful to following the authority structure of the Roman Catholic Church, they should primarily be concerned with the issues that the Vatican is currently concerned with. Instead of obsessing over James White, they should regularly be reading all the news coming out of the Vatican and first being concerned with that.

5) If this doesn't work and they insist that James White is a significant threat, encourage them to contact the Vatican directly to ask if James White is someone the Magisterium should be concerned with. In waiting for an answer,  encourage the sufferer to fast and pray rather than mention "James White" on social media. Breaking this social media addiction though by fasting and prayer probably won't work. Most people would rather spend their time online than doing that boring prayer and fasting stuff.

This has been a public service announcement.  Have a nice day... especially the folks on the "Catholics & Reformed" Facebook Group

Saturday, October 15, 2016

Marketing the Celebration of the Reformation


I haven't been posting as much because I've been busy revising many of my blog old entries. In the meantime, here's something from Luther Quest I came across a while back (ht: RS (Carl Vehse). While I understand that people like to have tangible identifiers of their interests and passions, some of this stuff displays more of a theology of glory than a theology of the cross.



Playmobil's Luther 

Reformation 500 Musical Bottle Opener 

Martin Luther "Here I stand" socks 

Reformation Christmas ornaments 

Luther's Rose Frisbee 

Reformation 500 Dog Collar "Give Fido a little something special with our Reformation 500 dog collar." 

Luther's Mallet Lapel Pin (Gold tone) "This mini mallet lapel pin is a reminder of Luther nailing his 95 Theses." 

Martin Luther Drink Coasters (Pack of 4) 

Reformation 500 Golf Tees (20/bag) "Tee up for the 500th anniversary of the Reformation! Each wooden tee proudly proclaims the Reformation 500 theme." 

Reformation 500 Shot Glass "Cheers! Here's to the 500th anniversary of the Reformation!" 

Nailed It. Sticky Notes 

Lutheran Ninja Stress Reliever "In October of 1517 Martin Luther changed the world by living out his faith, studying scripture and honoring the Lord. He tirelessly wrote thought provoking and challenging words and was steadfast in following Jesus. You could you say he was a Lutheran Ninja! As we prepare for Reformation Day 2015 we invite you to become a Lutheran Ninja." 

Martin Luther Reformation Balloons (made of mylar). 

Reformation Day - October 31, 1517 Dog T-Shirt


Tuesday, October 04, 2016

Tuesday, November 03, 2015

Luther is in Hell.

It's on the Internet, so it must be true:


http://dossiersdegospanews.blogspot.fr/2013/07/luther-est-en-enfer-vision-de-la.html#.VjfrVfmrRto

http://gloria.tv/?media=474051


In 1883, Sister Maria Serafina Micheli (1849-1911) was beatified in Faicchio in the province of Benevento in the diocese of Cerreto Sannita 28 May 2011, the foundress of the Sisters of the Angels, was going to Eisleben, Saxony, the birthplace of Luther.

The fourth centenary of the birth of the great heretic (10 November 1483) was celebrated on that day. Luther divided Europe and the Church deux.Les streets were crowded, balconies included. Among the many personalities were expected at any time, with the arrival of Emperor Wilhelm I, who presided over the solemn celebrations.

The future Blessed, noting the great hoopla was not interested in knowing the reason for this unusual animation, his only desire was to find a church and pray to be able to make a visit to the Blessed Sacrament. After walking for a while, she finally found one, but the doors were closed.

She knelt on the steps for Serenity Prayer. As it was in the evening, she had not noticed that it was not a Catholic church, but Protestant. While praying, the angel appeared, who said to him. "Arise, because it is a Protestant church"

Then he added: "But I want you to see where Martin Luther was condemned and the pain he suffered as a punishment for his pride."

After these words, she saw a terrible abyss of fire, where they were cruelly tortured countless souls.

In the bottom of this hole there was a man, Martin Luther, which differed from the other: it was surrounded by demons that forced him to kneel, and all armed with hammers, they tried in vain , to shove a big nail in the head.

Religious thought, if some of the people had seen this dramatic scene, they would not have made honors and other commemorations and celebrations for such a character.

Later, when the opportunity arose to remind his sisters live in humility and in secret. She was convinced that Martin Luther was punished in hell especially for the first deadly sin of pride.

Pride is a deadly sin, brought him open rebellion against the Roman Catholic Church. His behavior, his attitude towards the Church, and his preaching were crucial to encourage and bring many souls to eternal ruin and wrong.

Blessed Marie of the Sacred Heart Séraphine

founder of the Institute of Sisters of the Angels (✝ 1911)
Born in 1849, died March 24, 1911 at Faicchio, Italy, declared Venerable on July 3, 2009 by Pope Benedict XVI beatified on May 28, 2011.

Marie Séraphine the Sacred Heart (nee Clotilde Micheli), religious, founder of the Institute of Sisters of the Angels (1849 - 1911)

Monday, March 02, 2015

FYI, Yes, I am a "valuable friend of Catholic Answers"

 Dear James ,
Because you are a valuable friend of Catholic Answers, you have been selected to participate in a survey to help us improve our apostolate. As a thank-you, we will be giving away 25 signed copies of Tim Staples’s newest book, Behold Your Mother. Combining the best recent scholarship with in-depth knowledge of Scripture, this book offers the most thorough Marian apologetics you’ll find anywhere.

Give us your feedback by 11:59 p.m. on Sunday, March 8, 2015 and you will be entered to win one of 25 signed copies of Behold Your Mother!

Click here to start the survey.

Five minutes of your time will help Catholic Answers reach more souls than ever!

If you have any questions about the survey or any difficulty with the link, please contact Anh Nguyen at anguyen@catholic.com, or call 619-387-7200 ext. 333.

Catholic Answers is an apostolate dedicated to serving Christ by bringing the fullness of Catholic truth to the world. We want to be good stewards of our resources to do it as effectively and efficiently as possible. We’re determined to take the Church’s message to the people who need it most, and you can help us to do just that!
 
With every good wish, I am
Faithfully yours in Christ,
Christopher Check
Christopher Check
President

Wednesday, February 25, 2015

The Pope Accidently Visits Beggars All, Reformation and Apologetics

The pope was doing some research on Alister McGrath and accidentally ended up here. Sensing imminent danger,  and almost out-clicking to aomin.org, the computer was immediately shut down by attending prelates and checked for Protestant viruses. An inside source at the Vatican wishing to remain anonymous stated, "We've told Pope Francis a number of times to make sure 'safe search' is on, and to use the 'go anonymous' feature. We've told him it isn't all 'Catholic Answers' out in cyberspace, but he always says to lay off, or he'll say something else in public to cause Rome's defenders to exceed their bandwidth to explain it."

Because of the accidental visit, a number of Protestant viruses have been removed from the Vatican network: TriablogueTrojan, Dr.Oakleystheonomicbeard.exe, and the most deadly of all, the SnowCoveredDungDinger.


Beggars All: Reformation and Apologetics
Who's On? > Visit Detail
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Visit Number746,224

Friday, January 30, 2015

Peter's Church?

Here's a silly picture of a missing letter off a church sign. It does capture the essence of some of the recent blog posts and comments here.

Saturday, November 15, 2014

"Here I Stand" Board Game

Frankly, I'll stick with Risk. This is not a video game but rather an old-school board game... Just in time for Christmas, this game is a steal for a mere $110.14 at Amazon.



Reviews:

Here I Stand" from GMT Games, is a monster of game that recreates the political, military, and religious struggle of the mid-16th century. Players take on the roles of Britain, France, the Catholic Church, the Protestant Rebellion, the Turks, or the Hapsburgs. "Here I Stand" takes its title from Martin Luther's statement during the Diet of Worms in 1521. When Luther was ordered to recant his writings he said, "Here I stand. I can do no other."

The Game is card driven, where players can play cards for their historical events or for their point values. It is a similar system to GMT's "Twilight Struggle," "1989: Dawn of Freedom," and "Washington's War." This is a much, much bigger game however. Though the game only lasts nine turns, however, the details and nuance of each phase ensure this can easily be a 8-9 gaming experience. Still, players who devote the time to it will find a brilliant game that captures the flavor of the period, and yet still lets players engage in creating ahistorical timelines. The Hapsburg and French player essentially engage in a military conflict, while the Catholic and Protestant player duke it out in a series of religious debates with Germany as the prize. The English and Turkish players must expertly navigate the fringes of Europe and look for opportunities to advance their cause. Each player has unique victory conditions.

"Here I Stand" is truly a wonderful game that expertly blends play mechanics with its historical theme. The only downside is its length, meaning that it won't hit the table as much as I'd like. If you do enjoy a good historical scenario that is rich in detail and engaging theme, you'll want to look into "Here I Stand."


Sunday, January 12, 2014

Martin Luther, Reformer of Bowling

I've not heard this one before:
Bowling as we know it began in Germany sometime during the fifth century. People pretended that the pins were devils and they used a round rock or heavy ball as a weapon to knock them down. If successful, it indicated they were overcoming the temptations of the devil in their lives. If not, their lives still had too many sins. The number of pins used varied from three to seventeen. Martin Luther is credited with deciding on nine pins. In the 1800s, because bowling (or platzbahnkegln as it was then called Germany) was used for gambling, it was outlawed. But the law specified nine-pin bowling. Players added a 10th pin to avoid being illegal. A life-size diorama at the International Bowling Museum and Hall of Fame in St. Louis portrays Martin Luther bowling on the single lane at the side of his home. A brochure from the museum states that Luther, an avid bowler, “once preached a sermon that proclaimed Christians ‘strive for perfection in life. But when we roll a gutterball, all is not lost.’”
I have no idea if all this is true or not, but it certainly appears to be true that the Bowling Museum had the picture of Luther at one time. The museum is no longer in St. Louis, it's in Texas. Brecht notes that "Luther had a bowling alley built for the amusement of  his students in their spare time, and he occasionally participated in the game himself."

Addendum (ht: Carl Vehse): From a comment below, the quote in the pamphlet reads,"He [Luther] once preached a sermon which, if put into bowling vernacular, proclaimed we all strive for perfection in life. But if we roll a gutterball, all is not lost." So, the "quote" appears to be a loose paraphrase of something Luther is alleged to have said.

Addendum #2 (1/30/14)
This blog post was linked to by Gene Veith with his entry, Luther and Bowling? See the subsequent discussion. Carl Vehse noted my citation of Brecht (Martin Luther: Shaping and Defining the Reformation, 1521-1532 [Fortress Press, 1994, p. 432]), and also included Brecht's accompanying footnote:
Weimarer Ausgabe (Weimar Edition): D. Martin Luthers Werke: Kritische Gesammtausgabe (Dr. Martin Luther's Works: Critical Collected Edition), Briefwechsel (Correspondence), Volume 6: 199-200. Tischreden (Table Talk), Vol. 1, No. 261; Vol. 2, No. 1494.

Monday, December 02, 2013

What Does George Fox Say? Fun With Quaker Theology

For those of you who have been infected by one of the most insidious pop songs in decades, here's a spoof of the song based on Quaker theology:

Thursday, August 15, 2013

Joel Osteen Tweets, Luther Responds

This is a clever idea, but the truth is, Luther mixed substance in with his occasional outbursts of insulting rhetoric. He did not simply insult his opponents as the link below suggests:

http://adam4d.com/luther-vs-osteen/

Monday, June 03, 2013

Have the Nephilim Been Found?

Be careful what you find on the Internet! See: They Might Be Giants from Snopes.





Wednesday, March 20, 2013

Church Growth After the War of Independence

Recently, I've been studying early American church history. Here's a tidbit I came across:

Q. Why did the Methodists and Baptists excel the Presbyterians and Congregationalists in numerical growth after the War for Independence?

A. The Methodists would ordain any fool on a horse, and the Baptists would ordain the horse!


Friday, June 29, 2012

Stuff You Don't See on Catholic Answers or CTC

http://www.cukierski.net/three-days-darkness-package-p-126.html

"A Miracle similar to that at Fatima, a great wonder to convince many, predicted to take place on the Feast Day of a "young martyr" of the "Eucharist" but NOT on a holy day of Our Lady. The miracle will last for about a quarter of an hour and will be visible from Garabandal, Spain, and the surrounding mountains. Our Holy Father will see it no matter where he is at the time. This miracle will take place on a date which will be "announced" eight days BEFORE. Afterwards, God will leave a sign in memory of it."

Wednesday, June 20, 2012

Updating the Language of the Church Fathers

You know, language changes over the years, so I was thinking it would be best to revise some of the more popular quotes by the Church Fathers so that people can understand what they really mean. Here is my first suggestion:

Augustine: "I would not believe in the Gospel myself if the authority of the Catholic Church did not influence me to do so."

Revise to:

"I would not believe in the Gospel myself if the authority of the Catholic Church as interpreted by Catholic Answers and Called to Communion did not influence me to do so."

or: "I would not believe in the Gospel, had not the authority of the Catholic Church already moved me"

Revise to:

"I would not believe in the Gospel, had not the authority of someone's conversion story to the Catholic Church already moved me."

I'm open to suggestions on this one.

Wednesday, February 29, 2012

Would You Like to be Insulted by Luther?

I was recently sent over this link below (ht: Matthew).

Do you think you've got what it takes to stand being insulted by the great Reformer? Click on the link below and find out!

http://ergofabulous.org/luther/

http://tyler.rasmussen.name.s80883.gridserver.com/luther/







Also of interest, the Shakespearean Insulter.

Friday, February 17, 2012

Places to Go to get the Truth in a Dispute... Augustine Style

Do you have a situation in which you're not sure who is telling the truth? Here's what Augustine recommends:

1) Find the grave of a Christian martyr or someone "holy."

2) Bring the disputants to that grave.

3) Await the outcome of the truth.

If you've got a criminal who needs to come clean and fess up, this may work as well.

2. Wherefore, beloved, in regard to that scandal by which some are troubled concerning the presbyter Boniface, I do not say to you that you are not to be grieved for it; for in men who do not grieve for such things the love of Christ is not, whereas those who take pleasure in such things are filled with the malice of the devil. Not; however, that anything has come to our knowledge which deserves censure in the presbyter aforesaid, but that two in our house are so situated that one of them must be regarded as beyond all doubt wicked; and though the conscience of the other be not defiled, his good name is forfeited in the eyes of some, and suspected by others. Grieve for these things, for they are to be lamented; but do not so grieve as to let your love grow cold, and yourselves be indifferent to holy living. Let it rather burn the more vehemently in the exercise of prayer to God, that if your presbyter is guiltless (which I am the more inclined to believe, because, when he had discovered the immoral and vile proposal of the other, he would neither consent to it nor conceal it), a divine decision may speedily restore him to the exercise of his official duties with his innocence vindicated; and that if, on the other hand, knowing himself to be guilty, which I dare not suspect, he has deliberately tried to destroy the good name of another when he could not corrupt his morals, as he charges his accuser with having done, God may not permit him to hide his wickedness, so that the thing which men cannot discover may be revealed by the judgment of God, to the conviction of the one or of the other.
3. For when this case had long disquieted me, and I could find no way of convicting either of the two as guilty, although I rather inclined to believe the presbyter innocent, I had at first resolved to leave both in the hand of God, without deciding the case, until something should be done by the one of whom I had suspicion, giving just and unquestionable reasons for his expulsion: from our house. But when he was laboring most earnestly to obtain promotion to the rank of the clergy, either on the spot from myself, or elsewhere through letter of recommendation from me, and I could on no account be induced either to lay hands in the act of ordination upon one of whom I thought so ill, or to consent to introduce him through commendation of mine to any brother for the same purpose, he began to act more violently demanding that if he was not to be promoted to clerical orders, Boniface should not be permitted to retain his status as a presbyter. This demand having been made, when I perceived that Boniface was unwilling that, through doubts as to his holiness of life, offense should be given to any who were weak and inclined to suspect him, and that he was ready to suffer the loss of his honor among men rather than vainly persist even to the disquieting of the Church in a contention the very nature of which made it impossible for him to prove his innocence (of which he was conscious) to the satisfaction of those who did not know him, or were in doubt or prone to suspicion in regard to him, I fixed upon the following as a means of discovering the truth. Both pledged themselves in a solemn compact to go to a holy place, where the more awe-inspiring works of God might much more readily make manifest the evil of which either of them was conscious, and compel the guilty to confess, either by judgment or through fear of judgment. God is everywhere, it is true, and He that made all things is not contained or confined to dwell in any place; and He is to be worshipped in spirit and in truth by His true worshippers, in order that, as He heareth in secret, He may also in secret justify and reward. But in regard to the answers to prayer which are visible to men, who can search out His reasons for appointing some places rather than others to be the scene of miraculous interpositions? To many the holiness of the place in which the body of the blessed Felix is buried is well known, and to this place I desired them to repair; because from it we may receive more easily and more reliably a written account of whatever may be discovered in either of them by divine interposition. For I myself knew how, at Milan, at the tomb of the saints, where demons are brought in a most marvelous and awful manner to confess their deeds, a thief who had come thither intending to deceive by perjuring himself, was compelled to own his theft, and to restore what he had taken away; and is not Africa also full of the bodies of holy martyrs? Yet we do not know of such things being done in any place here. Even as the gift of healing and the gift of discerning of spirits are not given to all saints? as the apostle declares; so it is not at all the tombs of the saints that it has pleased Him who divideth to each severally as He will, to cause such miracles to be wrought. [source].

I'm thinking the next time two Roman apologists can't agree on something, this procedure should be followed. Let's see if it works to determine which one is correct. Or perhaps in the next priest scandal this method may come in handy as well.

Friday, December 30, 2011

100 Rival Priests clash at Church

"Brooms, fists and vicious insults flew in all directions between 100 priests and monks dressed in their traditional robes."

The Battle of Bethlehem: 100 rival priests clash at church built to mark birth of Jesus


ht: Carm Boars.

Monday, December 26, 2011

How to Create a Martin Luther Myth

Here's how to start your own Martin Luther myth. I recently read the following statements from Martin Luther and decided to beat my Roman Catholic friends to the punch.

Writing to his friend Nicolaus von Amsdorf, Luther stated:
"If you would like to refer the matter back to me, considering me as a pope (as I consider you a bishop- may God not be blamed for our great honors!), then you must consider that quite often the bishops have been more erudite and pious than the popes" [WA 38:330-331].


"For myself, I, who permit myself to be named a pope (as indeed I am)" [WA 38:331-333]
After posting these snippets (or perhaps before) declare something like, Luther thought he was a hyper-infallible super pope or some such inflammatory statement. The more shocking, the better. Never make any indication that Luther's contexts dictate the meaning of the sentences, or that Luther's polemical treatises are filled with strong hyperbole. This sort of admission is not at all helpful in spreading propaganda. Rather, describe Luther's words as examples of sadly self-deluded, megalomaniacal language or some other psycho-pleniloquence. If you're somewhat ecumenical, throw in something like Luther was sincere, but deluded.

Now in making a myth, this next part is crucial. If possible, use a secondary source rather than a primary source. This will often insulate your myth from direct exposure.  It's best to give no references. If you'd like to give off the appearance that you've done in-depth research, provide references that most people would have no idea what's being referred to. In the above example, I've used references to "WA". The typical person (say over on the Catholic Answers forums) would have no idea if WA stood for "Walla Walla" or Weimar. If they did get "Weimar" it would depend on their Google-smarts if the actual source could be either named or located. If either occurs, you're still safe because most of the folks I've run into can't read German or Latin. You're also fairly safe if they attempt to Google search the context for this quote in English. It's been my experience that a great majority of people don't care enough to actually look up references anyway. But every so often some pharisee-pest will come along looking to quibble about references and contexts. The more obscure you can make something, the better.

There you have it, a tidbit of propaganda is born. Simply begin posting the material on either your blog or a popular discussion board. Watch the quote travel recklessly through cyber-space!